Baby loss is something many families experience, yet it is often not spoken about openly. This silence can make it difficult to know what to say, how to help, or even whether to bring it up, especially if only a few people knew about the pregnancy.
Navigating such a sensitive situation can feel uncertain. But what matters most is the thought behind your support. Showing that you acknowledge their loss, that their baby mattered, and that they are not alone can bring real comfort. Sometimes, even the smallest gesture can feel like an anchor in their grief.
Gentle Ways to Support a Loved One
Acknowledge the loss
- A simple note or message can mean a great deal.
Listen without fixing
- Allow them to share or not share as much as they want.
Offer practical help
- Everyday tasks can feel overwhelming. Cooking a meal, running errands, or offering childcare for older children can ease the load in a very real way.
Remember important dates
- The due date, the date of the loss, or anniversaries can be especially hard. Sending a simple message such as “Thinking of you today” shows you remember.
Send something thoughtful
- Flowers, a card, a candle or a small keepsake can be a gentle reminder that they are not alone in their grief.
Thoughtful Gifts and Gestures
Meaningful keepsakes
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Personalised jewellery: something subtle and heartfelt to honour their baby.
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A memory box: for special mementoes or personal items.
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Custom artwork: a gentle way to create a lasting tribute.
Comforting gifts
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A candle: to light on anniversaries or special days.
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A soft blanket or scarf: cosy comfort when grief feels heavy.
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A self-care package: teas, bath salts or a journal to encourage rest and reflection.
Acts of remembrance
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Planting a tree, rosebush or wildflowers as a living tribute.
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Making a small donation in their baby’s name to a baby loss charity.
Resources (if and when they feel ready)
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Books – Gentle, supportive reads that share guidance or lived experiences
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Support groups & charities – Safe spaces to connect with others who have experienced baby loss:
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Sands (Stillbirth & Neonatal Death Charity) – Provides support groups across the UK, a helpline, and resources for families.
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Tommy’s – Offers advice, research updates, and support for parents through pregnancy loss.
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Petals – Counselling charity specialising in baby loss and trauma.
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The Miscarriage Association – Support groups, helpline and online resources tailored to miscarriage and early pregnancy loss.
Final Thoughts
There is no perfect way to support someone through baby loss, every experience is deeply personal. What matters most is showing that you care. Gentle words, practical kindness and remembering their baby with them can make a lasting difference.
If you are supporting a loved one, trust that small, thoughtful gestures can be powerful. Sometimes it’s not about finding the right words, but about making sure they don’t feel alone.
October is Baby Loss Awareness Month - a time to remember, raise awareness and stand alongside families who have experienced this heartbreak. Together, by showing kindness and compassion, we can help break the silence and honour every baby lost.
